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“What every human being can say yes to is flourishing.”—Martin Seligman “What makes life good?” It may be one of the oldest human questions, and perhaps one of the few we still might answer together. I think about this today after reading about the super elite folks from academia, finance, technology surrounding Jeffrey Epstein.  People with billions of dollars, anxious, untethered people with no real understanding in practice of what makes a good, healthy, flourishing life.

“Whenever you are confronted with an opponent, conquer them with love.” — Mahatma Gandhi It happened at our simple and popular community dinner Thursday night. The Seventh Day Adventists served their signature vegetarian “haystacks.” Usually it’s an easy-going, if a little rowdy, environment. That’s how these things often begin—not in lecture halls or debates, but at long tables where people come carrying their fully human selves. John had sat down with a young woman and her

“The most effective communicators aren’t the people who talk the most. They are the people who are best at understanding what kind of conversation is happening.”— Charles Duhigg, from Supercommunicators One evening, Charles Duhigg came home from work frustrated. Duhigg, a Pulitzer Prize–winning journalist who has written for The New York Times  and authored several books about human behavior, had spent the day struggling with a difficult boss. When he walked through the door

“People are generally better persuaded by the reasons which they have themselves discovered than by those which have come into the mind of others.”  — Blaise Pascal How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to really want to change. (Old joke, I use it a lot.) Several days ago one of my granddaughters announced, with the calm confidence only a young person can possess, that she intended to drive about fifteen hours by herself ac

“Let us not seek to satisfy our thirst for freedom by drinking from the cup of bitterness and hatred.” — Martin Luther King Jr. The Interfaith Justice Coalition is inviting me and others in the area to attend a candlelight vigil tonight for Alex Pretti. I am mulling over where I stand during this turbulent time.  What wisdom do I draw on? Two stories, two incidents, from the sixties help. They were incidents that happened in my memory of the Civil Rights era that seem to rise

“Vocation does not come from willfulness. It comes from listening.”— Parker J. Palmer For many years, my father did not like Santa. Nor December. Not even the Christmas season. He was a bit of a Grinch. But not because his heart was two sizes too small. It was something different. He loved Jesus with a steady, serious devotion. He was a minister. He believed Christmas mattered. And because it mattered so much, he felt protective of it. Anything that felt like a distraction

We don’t see things as they are, we see them as we are.  Anaïs Nin I wrote most of this blog in the past, but wanted to re-visit it because first, John and I have just celebrated an anniversary, fifty two years of marriage. It’s a big marker for us.  We lived through several renditions of ourselves along side of each other. Second, because relationships, both struggles and successes are the basis of most all our human problems as well as the primary route to flourishing.  Ver

“We are caught in an inescapable network of mutuality, tied in a single garment of destiny.”— Martin Luther King Jr. The air is a bit...

“When people experience autonomy, they feel more alive, more creative, and more fulfilled.” — Edward Deci & Richard Ryan,...

Back home, I didn’t fit in. I thought Earth was the problem, but what if it’s me? – Elio Well, I like you and you seem fine to me. –...

“Everything We Do Is an Attempt to Meet a Need.” Marshall Rosenberg I’m going to share a story.  Like the previous blog, this isn’t the...

Politeness is to human nature what warmth is to wax - Arthur Schopenhauer, German philosopher This isn’t exactly the story that...

“We often find that the harder we try to get rid of emotions and thoughts, the stronger they become….” ― Richard C. Schwartz,  No Bad...

“The front porch is a place where time slows down, the breeze always seems cooler, and the stories never really end.”  —Rick Bragg,...

“Daddy," I whispered, feeling my own breath hitch in my throat. "I love you." Just when I was sure he was asleep, the one corner of his...

What do most people say on their deathbed? They don't say, "I wish I'd made more money." What they say is, I wish I'd spent more time...

"Therefore everyone who hears these words of mine and puts them into practice is like a wise man who built his house on the rock." ...

"America did not invent human rights. In a very real sense . . . human rights invented America." 38th president of the United States,...

“If the only prayer you ever say in your entire life is thank you, it will be enough.” Meister Eckhart   Dr. Christopher Peterson tells...

Contempt is the sulfuric acid of love . Dr. John Gottman, relationship expert “How did this happen?  I just don’t understand.” That’s...