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“People are generally better persuaded by the reasons which they have themselves discovered than by those which have come into the mind of others.” — Blaise Pascal How many therapists does it take to change a light bulb? Only one, but the light bulb has to really want to change. (Old joke, I use it a lot.) Several days ago one of my granddaughters announced, with the calm confidence only a young person can possess, that she intended to drive about fifteen hours by herself ac

We are not "in love"... but, we are love. I'm glad, It lasts longer. Portia Nelson, There's a Hole in My Sidewalk Portia Nelson's book of poetry just got to me yesterday. The 35th edition, originally published in 1997. Though it's a classic, I have only ever read the opening poem, the most famous one in it - Autobiography in Five Short Chapters . It is used often in therapy groups including those recovering from addiction largely to teach mindfulness and help

"These pains you feel are messengers. Listen to them." Rumi, Poet It was not an ordinary evening. Last night. It was supposed to be a night of "Follies" - a fun community talent event in Wenatchee. But it was being overshadowed. There was a damper-like feeling in the air, the kind that settles over a small town when something has shifted and no one quite knows what to do with it. John and I were sitting in a little local Mexican restaurant in Cashmere. The room was warm, the

“Your breathing is your greatest friend. Return to it in all your troubles and you will find comfort and guidance.” — Anthony de Mello. Indian Jesuit Priest, psychotherapist A friend and mentor, Dr. Frank Rogers, Jr. once told a story that is both sobering and, if we are honest, a little funny (It’s in his book, Practicing Compassion; I have his permission to share it with you . ). After 9/11, during the invasion of Iraq, a small Quaker group organized a silent peace vigil at

“Evil is something that ordinary people do, not something that only special people do.” — Roy Baumeister I want to begin with a story that has stayed with me for years because it unsettles a myth we like to believe about ourselves as people. A dear friend—an exceedingly good man and a trusted leader—once told me that he had been a participant in the obedience experiments conducted by Stanley Milgram. You’ve likely heard of these studies but hearing them through the voice of s

The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing. - Socrates Uplifting new research strongly indicates that human beings, both as...

When it comes to luck, make your own. – Bruce Springsteen I love the research on luck. It started for me when I first read The Luck...

“The world is full of magic things, patiently waiting for our senses to grow sharper.” W. B. Yeats Let’s get right to it – we are taking...

The more we realize that most of our views of ourselves, of others, and of presumed limits regarding our talents, our health, and our...

"Know thyself” - well-known philosophical maxim originating in ancient Greece How can we be wiser? Particularly how can we be wiser with...

Stop, breathe slow, and make a smart choice." Aldie, mindful paragon Imagine yourself at bedtime. An adult processing the day. Think...

“With awareness, we can make conscious choices, instead of letting our habitual thoughts and patterns run the show.” – Tamara Levitt,...

"What we have learned to look for in any situation determines mostly what we see." Dr. Ellen Langer, professor of psychology, Harvard....

The little things? The little moments? They aren’t little. Dr. Jon Kabat-Zinn, Ph.D. in molecular biology, MIT, Nobel Laureate in...

“Big egos have little ears.” Robert Schuller Family members strung out particularly around the West Coast, Idaho, Utah, and Colorado...